Full Speed Ahead!

I have made a semi-final decision about my major. I am going to try to double-major in Elementary Education and Religion/Philosophy for a semester. If it is too much work, or I don't like it, or there are other things I want to do which I wouldn't be able to do with the double major, I will go from there. But as for now, I am very content with my decision.

I will be taking LOTS of gen-eds next semester, so I'm not sure that it will actually give me a good idea of how busy I will be with the double-major, but I'll just take it as it comes. Until then, I made the decision to put the pedal to the metal on my academics. I slacked off this week - extraordinarily (for me). I decided that this weekend I am going to commit myself to catching up on readings, finishing papers, and filling my mind with ideas for upcomming projects. I want to get my GPA up as high as possible, so that it is not as much of a concern next semester. We'll see how long this vigor lasts.

I am quite excited about this change. I was so ready for a change of pace. I think that I get restless in El Ed so easily because teaching is not all that I want to do. But over the past week I have realized how crucial a degree in teaching will be for me in the future. Not only will I use what I am learning in ministry, but I will also very likely teach in a school while attending Seminary. Also, it's a back-up plan for if it turns out that the Lord isn't calling me to ministry (I must clarify that I do not in any way doubt my call to ministry, but Jesus has many ways of working, and I cannot ever assume that I know exactly where He wants me or why I feel Him working in the ways that I do).

Sam and I were talking today about where we see ourselves for the rest of our lives (it began with Sam telling me that I have to have at least one girl, so that our girls can be best friends... and then we decided that one of my boys will marry one of her girls. But we have to live near each other for these plans to succeed). I go through stages of how I feel about my future. One day it excites me to think about the uncertainty of where I am headed, and the next I can feel overwhelmed and scared because I don't know where I'm going. There are also the days when I feel like I know exactly where I am headed, and I am so very excited about it; while there are other days that I think about where I think that I am headed and I am scared to death about it. There are so many directions that I see my life going in right now. It can be overwhelming and scary and at the same time feel adventurous and exciting! I think that the two things that are really on my mind the most, though, are getting married (of course) and missionary work. I have mixed feelings about both of these things, but at the same time I am constantly open to wherever God wants to lead me. Now that's a pretty cool feeling!

Well, this got long, and it's past my bedtime. Thanks for reading!